A little bit more about things.....

After the background and introductions, a little bit more to fill out the picture. I just don't know where else to put everything that I'm feeling. The heartbreak every month is horrific. People not knowing is also difficult, sometimes I think it would be good to talk but at the same time I don't want to discuss it. I'm very good at putting a front on for the outside world, perhaps too good, and maybe it's just easier when people don't know.

I'm taking all the vitamins, I even have hubby taking some concoction of all manner of pills. Even tho he's fine according to all the tests! It has to be me. The worst thing is not knowing tho, if I knew what it was I could do something about it but not knowing is just worse because you don't know what to do. I think I've had three early miscarriages. I'm very lucky with my cycle, I can always predict when my period is going to arrive within 24hrs (usually within 12!) and I'm never late. Except three times. October 2012 I was three days late, January 2013 I was four days late (and abroad for work, miles away from hubby. That one was the worst) and then this month, September 2013, I was seven days late. Seven days. That's unheard of for me.

I am still drinking, which I realise a lot of people will frown upon, but I gave up for three months at the start of this year and that didn't make a difference. So I'd rather relax with a drink every now and again, or enjoy myself when we go out, then feel miserable not drinking at all. And it's not as if I'm drinking a bottle of wine every weekend or as if I'm drinking every day! But that's about it really. I eat a balanced, healthy diet (mainly anyway! Who can't resist a bit of chocolate or some ice cream occasionally?!) and I exercise regularly. Yes, I am a little overweight. About half a stone, maybe a stone tops. But I've tried losing it for two years and no diet works. I've tried the 5:2 thing (six weeks, lost nothing), I've tried upping my exercise and I've tried Slimfast (which surely isn't healthy long term anyway?!) and nothing works. I currently use an app on my phone to count my calories - usually around 1200 a day. And there are days I struggle to hit that! But still the weight won't come off. My husband was convinced I had a thyroid problem, that that would explain not only the weight loss issue but also the fact we couldn't seem to conceive. But it was one of the first things they tested for in my initial blood tests and apparently not.

So there we are. Still, just the HSG to go and we get to see a consultant. Let's all try and stay positive shall we?

Take care folks xx