Howdy.
Apologies for the tardiness of late, January is in insanely busy time at work and I'm only just getting my head above water again. I hope you're all well and not having too bad a case of the January blues!
Soooooo, a lot has happened of late. And I was actually planning on writing this blog entry on a completely different subject. I have recently opened up about our situation to my group of oldest girlfriends, the gang I went to secondary school with, and the response has been mixed to say the least. But that will have to wait for another time as I bring news of something else that has rocked the insane tea party that goes on inside the darkest depths of my head that you, dear reader, are only one of a handful of people that know about.
Not sure if I've blogged about this couple before, quite possibly so
apologies if I'm saying stuff you already know. But one of hubby's best friends
is married to a really close friend of mine. Us girls met our boys at roughly the same time, started dating within six months of each
other and the boys were best men at each other's weddings (the boys have known each other since school). They married a year after us and started trying early last year. She has been one of the most understanding people about our situation, in fact both of them have been absolutely fab. It was her baby shower in November that I tweeted about, saying I just couldn't face it and she completely understood. It took her about five months to fall pregnant and she was so sympathetic to our plight whilst they were trying, every month she was upset that it hadn't happened and therefore had a lot of empathy about how much harder it must be for us. When it finally did work for them they came over to our place (despite the fact we'd only moved in the week before and the place was a tip!) to tell us on their way back from the hospital on the way to the parents after her 12wk scan. So thoughtful.
Bang on due date, baby arrived this week. They had no idea of the sex, they'd wanted to find out but baby hadn't played ball during their two scans so we were all convinced it would be a boy! It wasn't, it was a girl. And they name they've given her is our baby girl name. It sounds insane to say that we have names already, but way before we were even engaged we just knew that we were going to be stuck with each other! We used to get drunk and have evenings going through each other's past and issues and we'd also talk about the future. We decided upon three girls names (first and middle names) as well as three boys names (again, first and middle) but neither of us could remember anything but one or two of each when we were trying to recall the conversations when sober. Still, the first pick for both boys and girls names we remembered as they were names that meant a lot to us, names that were in the family. If that makes sense?!
So, even tho their name is the abbreviated form and we'd use the 'full' version (due to where we've taken the name from) and even tho they've spelt it slightly differently to how we would I am still struggling even more than I do normally with the announcement of this new arrival.
They've posted pictures of her on social media and she’s so cute! An adorable little thing. But I can’t use her name when I talk about her. I just can’t. I wanted to go and get them a baby girl card at lunchtime today and I just knew I wouldn’t be able to
write that name inside it. Luckily hubby has stepped in and said he'll go out at lunchtime today and get a card and write it. I genuinely don't think I could do it.
All of this is slightly insane. I have no idea if we will have children one day, let alone have a girl! So in some respects it's lovely that our name has been used, even if it's not for our child. But what if one day the stars all align, it does work and we have a daughter. There is no way I'm changing what we'd name her because of where that name comes from. Are we going to be accused of unoriginality? Will people think we've stolen the name? If only they knew that if it had only taken us six months to conceive (and we'd had a girl!) the name would have been walking and talking by now and they would have had to find another name for their daughter.
Another horrible twist of fate to add to the infertility experience.
